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By our children witnessing arguing and unhappiness in our homes, are we guilty of sowing seeds that will grow into big problems for them as they grow up?

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Saturday, July 19th

Today's Daily Verse is found in Proverbs 19.13

"A self-confident and foolish son is the [multiplied] calamity of his father, and the contentions of a wife are like a continual dripping of water through a chink in the roof.       - Amplified version

An Amazing Appearance by An Angel...

Judges 13.12

"So Manoah asked him, “Can you give us any special instructions about how we should raise the baby after he is born?”

Judges 13     The Birth of Samson

Again the Israelites did evil in the Lord’s sight, so the Lord handed them over to the Philistines, who oppressed them for forty years.

2 In those days a man named Manoah from the tribe of Dan lived in the town of Zorah. His wife was unable to become pregnant, and they had no children. 3 The angel of the Lord appeared to Manoah’s wife and said, “Even though you have been unable to have children, you will soon become pregnant and give birth to a son. 4 So be careful; you must not drink wine or any other alcoholic drink nor eat any forbidden food. 5 You will become pregnant and give birth to a son, and his hair must never be cut. For he will be dedicated to God as a Nazirite from birth.

He will begin to rescue Israel from the Philistines.”

6 The woman ran and told her husband, “A man of God appeared to me! He looked like one of God’s angels, terrifying to see. I didn’t ask where he was from, and he didn’t tell me his name. 7 But he told me, ‘You will become pregnant and give birth to a son. You must not drink wine or any other alcoholic drink nor eat any forbidden food. For your son will be dedicated to God as a Nazirite from the moment of his birth until the day of his death.’

8 Then Manoah prayed to the Lord, saying, “Lord, please let the man of God come back to us again and give us more instructions about this son who is to be born.”

9 God answered Manoah’s prayer, and the angel of God appeared once again to his wife as she was sitting in the field. But her husband, Manoah, was not with her. 10 So she quickly ran and told her husband, “The man who appeared to me the other day is here again!”

11 Manoah ran back with his wife and asked, “Are you the man who spoke to my wife the other day?”

“Yes,” he replied, “I am.”

12 So Manoah asked him, “When your words come true, what kind of rules should govern the boy’s life and work?”

13 The angel of the Lord replied, “Be sure your wife follows the instructions I gave her. 14 She must not eat grapes or raisins, drink wine or any other alcoholic drink, or eat any forbidden food.”

15 Then Manoah said to the angel of the Lord, “Please stay here until we can prepare a young goat for you to eat.”

16 “I will stay,” the angel of the Lord replied, “but I will not eat anything. However, you may prepare a burnt offering as a sacrifice to the Lord.” (Manoah didn’t realize it was the angel of the Lord.)

17 Then Manoah asked the angel of the Lord, “What is your name? For when all this comes true, we want to honor you.”

18 “Why do you ask my name?” the angel of the Lord replied. “It is too wonderful for you to understand.”

19 Then Manoah took a young goat and a grain offering and offered it on a rock as a sacrifice to the Lord. And as Manoah and his wife watched, the Lord did an amazing thing. 20 As the flames from the altar shot up toward the sky, the angel of the Lord ascended in the fire. When Manoah and his wife saw this, they fell with their faces to the ground.

21 The angel did not appear again to Manoah and his wife. Manoah finally realized it was the angel of the Lord, 22 and he said to his wife, “We will certainly die, for we have seen God!”

23 But his wife said, “If the Lord were going to kill us, he wouldn’t have accepted our burnt offering and grain offering. He wouldn’t have appeared to us and told us this wonderful thing and done these miracles.”

24 When her son was born, she named him Samson. And the Lord blessed him as he grew up. 25 And the Spirit of the Lord began to stir him while he lived in Mahaneh-dan, which is located between the towns of Zorah and Eshtaol.

How does any suffering family get back on track...

Let's connect the two parts to this proverb.

  1. The foolish son
  2. The contentious wife

Does "contention", bickering..cause serious problems with the children?

How unhappy the home is when both of these - a foolish son, and a contentious wife are found...

  • They are more than likely go together

But here's the problem.

Where the wife disputes her husband's authority, and takes sides with the children in opposition to the father's proper discipline - the effect upon the children will be anything but good or enjoyable.

Here's why.

  • It is very common to have parents arguing
  • The children see and hear it all
  • What the parents do not understand is that they are "sowing seeds"
  • Bad seeds
  • When the mom and dad argue and wrangle - the children learn to despise the father's authority


  • Because they see their mom doing it, and the result is that the children will grow up with a rebellious and lawless spirit, - bent on having their own way and refusing to submit to proper discipline because they have been shown how by their mother
  • If mom argues and defies dad - then they learn how to do it as well and the child rejects the mother's correction as well

Tough medicine coming up...

There is a formula that allows family to grow up happy...

There are 3 chapters that need our attention to adequately address this matter. Do you want GOD information concerning how the family structure should operate?

Hold on tight, and let's dare to look at the following...

Ephesians 5.21-28

21 "And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

  • both submit to each other, like you used to when dating...

22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

  • if the wife does submit, it opens the door to have the Holy Spirit of GOD deal directly and severely, if necessary to the husband...

25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. 28 In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.

  • Before we go any further, we know that GOD holds the husband responsible to love his wife as Christ loves the church and to provide for her...and most husbands fail in this - however, if the need is there - please be open to see this as a guide for all the future...let's begin the change the movie playing in our head...

Colossians 3.18-20

" Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord.

19 Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly.

20 Children, always obey your parents, for this pleases the Lord. 21 Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged."

  • this whole chapter lays out what needs to be changed in our thinking and in our behavior. It is a staggering list...

I can't help it... here is some of that list  -

  • So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you.
  • Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires.
  • Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.
  • But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language.
  • Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds.
  • Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.
  • Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
  • Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you.
  • Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
  • Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.
  • And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your heart

I expect it will take the rest of our lives to get this list in order!

1 Peter 3

3 In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some [husbands] refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives.

  •  Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes.
  • You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.
  • This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands.
  • For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do.


  • In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives.
  • Treat your wife with understanding as you live together.
  • She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life.
  • Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

Michal, the daughter of King Saul...

Michal’s Contempt for David

16 But as the Ark of the Lord entered the City of David, Michal, the daughter of Saul, looked down from her window. When she saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord, she was filled with contempt for him.

17 They brought the Ark of the Lord and set it in its place inside the special tent David had prepared for it. And David sacrificed burnt offerings and peace offerings to the Lord. 18 When he had finished his sacrifices, David blessed the people in the name of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. 19 Then he gave to every Israelite man and woman in the crowd a loaf of bread, a cake of dates, and a cake of raisins. Then all the people returned to their homes.

20 When David returned home to bless his own family, Michal, the daughter of Saul, came out to meet him. She said in disgust, “How distinguished the king of Israel looked today, shamelessly exposing himself to the servant girls like any vulgar person might do!”

21 David retorted to Michal, “I was dancing before the Lord, who chose me above your father and all his family! He appointed me as the leader of Israel, the people of the Lord, so I celebrate before the Lord. 22 Yes, and I am willing to look even more foolish than this, even to be humiliated in my own eyes! But those servant girls you mentioned will indeed think I am distinguished!” 23 So Michal, the daughter of Saul, remained childless throughout her entire life.

1 Chronicles 15.29 "But as the Ark of the Lord’s Covenant entered the City of David, Michal, the daughter of Saul, looked down from her window. When she saw King David skipping about and laughing with joy, she was filled with contempt for him."

GOD help us as parents against unwittingly sowing destructive seeds into the young hearts of our children...

Those seeds may afterwards spring up to yield deadly fruit...

May GOD give us His Grace to correct our own behaviors and become a humble, yet effective example for our children to follow, not to fight!

See you tomorrow...

In the meantime:

May I encourage you to call or email someone and invite them to join us in our daily study in Proverbs...

Making Better Thought-Movies One Truth At A Time